Chainsaw Bill

If one is to run one's own farm, one must learn the safe operation of one's chainsaw.

Let me tell you that I had no idea that learning to use a chainsaw was part of the curriculum, so I was a little nervous.  Rumors floated around about a high school driver's ed-style blood and guts video detailing the horrors of clueless, untrained chainsaw operators.  People also referred to the course instructor as 'Chainsaw Bill', which brought to mind visions of Freddy Krueger and Jason from Friday the 13th. 

'Chainsaw Bill' turned out to be veteran logger Bill Girard from The Game of Logging, which, according to the organization's website, is "widely acknowledged as the premier timber harvesting training program in the country, offering hands-on training in a competitive environment. Top instructors across the country combine demonstration with participation to teach safety, productivity, conservation and cutting techniques."  The course most definitely lived up to that description.

Bill with the students

Bill (in Kevlar gear), instructing Todd and Phil

Over the next three days, he led us through a series of lessons on everything you ever wanted to know about chainsawing: personal protective equipment, safety checks, maintenance, sharpening, the five-point tree felling plan, spring pole release, limbing, and bucking firewood.  I appreciated how hard core he was about safety.  In the end there was no scary video, but he had about a million stories of people who have been impaled, eviscerated, decapitated, maimed, lacerated, who have bled out from internal injuries, suffered permanent head injury, received dozens of stitches, and have become alcoholics because they couldn't work any more. He peppered these stories throughout the three days of the workshop, just to keep things extra entertaining.

In the end, he inspired confidence and was a patient, kind teacher...I became fairly comfortable running the saw.  I gotta say it helped that he was standing right next to me to make sure I didn't wind up in the ER.  Thanks, Bill!


Watch as I fell a tree: